Why being insecure/vulnerable is not a bad thing.

Very recently, I was talking to my mom about how important it is for us to be strong and not reveal our deep fears about life. She said it is very crucial for us to be strong but it should not cast a compulsion in your lives to not to express your fears or emotional vulnerability. I feel expressing your fears, isn’t a sign of weakness. It shows that you have the courage. When everybody says ‘I’m fine’, more often than not they do not mean it. Most people have a tendency to hide their day-to-day problems because they don’t want to show any weakness. They fear being judged.

 The grim reality of our lives is that right from the childhood we are conditioned not to express our insecurities or fears or anxieties. Parents, teachers often scold those kids who talk about the issues plaguing them and which in turn makes us to falsely believe that only emotions which are to be expressed are that of happiness and anger, while sorrows and fears are to be grieved in solitude or in other words one should bottle up such emotions. But research has proved that this tendency of bottling up emotions and not sharing them can cause some psychological problems and sometimes physical pain too.

Vulnerability to me is not a weakness but a symbol of us being human. It is often been wrongly associated with emotions like shame, grief and sadness – the type of emotions which we are not comfortable discussing about even as these affect us in more ways than one. It is because of this vulnerability that we sometimes get to enjoy love, courage and joy. Many authors believe that it is the source of hope and empathy.

Things which we should share but we don’t do it in reality;

• If we are going through a tough time in our bonding/relationship with anyone.
• When anyone has lost the job or is enduring a stressful environment at their workplace.
• If a person is suffering from a major illness.
• Insecurities about life.

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